Hi everyone!
I'm a first time poster and this might be my first and last post but I just wanted to get other dog peoples' opinions on my Standard Poodle's recent behavior.

A little history, I grew up in Atlanta, always wanted a dog, finally at 17 we got a standard poodle puppy (Buddy). He was 4 months old and so stinking cute, not to mention smart. I did ALL of his training, took him to puppy class, etc. Buddy was my dog, he was my shadow followed me everywhere, slept in my room, etc. I ended up coming up to New England for college and now, 7 years later I'm still in New England. I try to go home 3-4 times a year and Buddy reacts like I never left, he goes crazy when I first walk in the door and then sticks to me like glue when I'm home. He normally sleeps in a dog bed in the spare bedroom but for some reason when I'm home and I say "Buddy bedtime" he runs to the steps to go to my room instead of going to his bed in the spare bedroom on the main floor. When I'm getting ready to leave Buddy sees my suitcase and that tail goes right down, breaks my heart every time. As much as I'd love to bring him up to New England with me I know it wouldn't be fair to take him away from living the good life with my parents, going from a big house in the 'burbs to a small apt in the city, among other things.

Anyway, the question...when I was home last week my boyfriend came down with me. Buddy has met Steve a once before. Bud is always a little skittish at first meeting new people but warms up easily and is ready to play with in the first 15 minutes, this was no different with Steve. This visit though Steve and I were cuddling and Buddy started "poodle poking" Steve. Anybody with Standard Poodle knows what I'm talking about. I'm told it's not aggressive behavior, that it's how they play but I'm not sure what Buddy was about in this situation. I put him in a down and stay and went back to cuddling with Steve (maybe that was mean of me to do). So then I gave Steve a kiss good night as he was getting ready to go to his room for bed. Buddy cried! It was the strangest thing. He stayed in his down, stared at the two of us, and made his little baby crying noises. He has never seen me give affection like that to anyone but a family member (which he has never had a problem with) and he's never like that when my parents are affectionate (maybe because he grew up seeing them do that). What are y'alls thoughts? Was Buddy jealous? Or concerned because he didn't know that Steve wouldn't hurt me.

Thanks for your opinions. I'm back in New England and I cried like a baby when I said bye to Buddy (like I always do).

Meghan

[natalie265]

I DO think that dogs have more complex emotions than some people give them credit for. My chihuahua always insists on sleeping in between my new husband and me. I've never been sure if he does this because he's being possessive of me or protective of me, or if its simply the most comfortable.

I'm sure you know whats best for your dog, but your story made me hope that you'd reconsider moving him to new england. Obviously he's very attached to you.

[CorkyMax]

I was thinking the same thing about taking your dog with you to your own place. Do you know what he does every day where he is now? Is he just waiting for you to come back? Is it just the hazzle of making the change (adjustment)?? In my book on the different breeds--It says that a poodle is ideal for apartment living, but needs plenty of exercise.
Also says a very good watchdog, particularly the Standard Poodle. Very intelligent and LOYAL---This dog is evidently very loyal to you!! How can you not take him to live with you??!! If you love him as much as you say you do----Yes there are adjustments to be made---Are they too big that you can't at least take him home with you for a trial run to see how things go!!?? And long enough to make the adjustment work---You should be able to tell if he is happier being there with you then back where he was. I have a feeling that this intelligent loyal dog will adjust faster than you will to the new 'environment!' Please consider this---In my book, that dog needs to be with you! :???:

Oh I wish I could relocate him up here, I've talked to my parents about a few times but it just doesn't seem fair to him. I agree Standards have the rep of adapting well and Buddy is definitely one of those dogs. He loves me and is my shadow when I'm home and when I leave my parents say he mopes for a day and is back to being his happy, bouncy self.

The reasons I don't think it's fair to bring Buddy to live with me are:
Both my parents are retired and home with Buddy everyday for most of the day (with the exception of errands and socializing and the occasional trip). I'm a nurse and I work 12 hour shifts (which actually turn into 14 hours away from the house), 3 days a week and my schedule changes everyweek AND I rotate from days to nights. Knowing my dog's personality I know he would HATE being alone for that long, even if I had a dog walker come a couple times a day.

The other issue is that I have a roommate who is not thrilled about getting a dog. As long as she has any hesitations I wouldn't want to get one. I also want to make sure I'm in a good place financially for a dog and poodles don't come cheap.

So anyway, I would LOVE to bring Buddy up here but I just know he'd be miserable. He love when I'm home but he is more than happy with my parents, he has a great life.

Thanks for your thoughts!

[Lara's mom]

From what you've said, I think your dog would be better off left with your parents. If your room mate isn't willing to share the responsibility of caring for your dog, your work hours just render the whole thing not doable.

Lara's Mom,
I absolutely agree!
:-)

[CorkyMax]

Thanks for your fast email reply--And now I see that it wouldn't be a good idea to have him in your home! Do you spend any vacation time at your parent's place with him? If you do, I'll bet he is one happy boy! This is a sad situation for you both--but being an ajustable dog and intelligent, he prob. knows that you will be back to see him again. About the boyfriend thing--The poodle prob. (being smart) figures--So this is the reason you are gone and feels like he has been replaced---Just keep seeing your dog as much as you can--(and not bringing the boyfriend home on every visit back home in the future would prob. make your poodle more secure.) I feel for you both--It is sad but guess you are making the choices you have to for you both. Give the dog a hug for me next time you see him.

[DoggieVogue]

I commend you for putting your dog's needs and emotional health before your wants. A lot of people are selfish, and would bring their dog up anyway, just because they wanted to. Your dog would be miserable and unhealthy living with you and it would strain your relationship with your roommate, so you are by all means doing the right thing. Its sad, since he loves you so much, and it must be terribly rough for him to see you, but unfortunately its the right thing to do.

Thanks Doggievogue.

The other thing I forgot to mention in relocating Buddy is that if you think about the fact that he's 8 (will be 9 in November) and my family got him the summer before my senior year of high school he's only known me living at home for 1 year and he's known me coming and going for longer (7.5 years). Like I said I came up here for college and the longest I was ever home after I graduated high school was about 2 months. So Buddy's know his life with my parents far longer than he's known life with me in the house. And I also failed to mention that no matter how much I begged and pleaded my parents would never let Bud come up here, they love him and dote on him (my mom, a self proclaimed non dog person, calls herself Buddy's "Nana" and makes up silly songs to sing to him) and my father (6'6 280lbs and 70 years old) spends his evenings rolling around the floor with Buddy, even though it takes him 20 minutes to get back up off the floor (he has bad knees). Like I've said, Buddy is living the good life!

That being said, I wait patiently for the day that I can adopt my own Standard Poodle (need a purebred for my allergies but do plan to rescue an adult dog) even if that day is 10 years from now, when I own my own home or am in apartment that allows dogs (with no hesitant roommate). Thanks for all your thoughts and opinions, I'll probably continue to lurk around the forum (even though I'm not a current dog owner) because it makes me happy to read all the dog stories and see the pics.

Meghan

[Lara's mom]

Meghan:

You've made the right decision. I commend you for putting your dogs needs ahead of your own. A lot of people aren't capable of doing that. Your baby is much better off staying with your parents, given your current circumstances.

[lil mutt]

Nice decision... i agree with you...