hi!
my name is sparrow shafer. we have a dog named Skundi. and we have been having some problems with him for some time now, and wondered if you could give us some advice as to what to do about it. my husband and i met a year ago, and i moved to iceland to be with him. but Skundi hasnt seemed to have adjusted to it at all. he is a generally good dog, but he refuses to obey me, and when i try to make him obey me, he bites me. he has recently been neutered, at the end of august, but this has been going on since i first moved here, last december. we have tried everything, from being nice to being mean as an attempt to stop this biting and general aggressiveness toward me, and nothing is having any effect. he has also started breaking rules that he knows he isnt allowed to do, such as taking food off the table, and peeing in the house. Gisli and i have a baby coming in a few days, and i have a 2 year old daughter, and we are worried about how he is going to react to that, he seems very jealous of me, and i am afraid that its going to worsen with the new baby around. Skundi also seems to be having some really bad separation anxiety. if we leave him at the house alone, he barks and sometimes pees on the floor. then when we come home, he follows us around on our ankles ALL DAY LONG. and wont lay down. he gets plenty of attention, and he gets regular excercise. but still seems to be struggling with this problem. he seems to not directly HATE me, because i can pet him and play with him most of the time, but when it comes to disciplining him, or if he gets any sort of command from me, he either brushes it off, or bites me. and sometimes he bites for no reason. last week i just walked past him laying on the floor, and he snapped at my leg. and every time i try to put a leash on him, or take one off, he bites at me. i cant live like this for much longer, and i WILL NOT risk him biting the new baby, or my daughter. so i was wondering if you could give me some advice. i hate to say it, but i seem to be much more concerned about this than my husband .he seems to just brush it off most of the time. he has never had a problem with Skundi until i came here, and ive never to my knowledge done anything to make him think he needs to be agressive with me. is it jealousy, or is something else wrong? im at the end of my patience with Skundi, and i just really dont know what to do. im not sure if perhaps his breed plays a part in this. he is a border collie/german shepherd mix. i would really appreciate any help you could give me! thank you very much,
sparrow shafer
reykjavik iceland

I'm no expert, but it sounds to me like a dominance issue. Dogs descend from wolves, which are pack animals. Your husband has always most likely been the Alpha or top dog in Skundi's life, and he prolly thinks he ranks right below your husband. And with you coming into their lives, he probably views you as ranking lower than he does. (i know this may sound a little crazy, but my dog works pretty similarly) so, when you try and discipline him, he displays aggression because from his point of view, you're lower in rank, and you dont have the right to do so. (go figure, my dog views me as the subordinate, so i get a lot of attitude from him when i try and discipline him.. ) though i do notice it gets better when i'm the one who provides his food and enjoyment, and treats. (i still live with my folks, so they like to give him treats and walk him as well) but if you feed him when it's meal time, walk him,play with him, give him treats and praise(and for a longer period of time, as an everyday thing). you may be able to earn his respect. (maybe for walking, have you husband put the leash on/ take it off, until he shows improvement) i dont know if this will work, but i would just suggest make being around you a positive experience for him. this apparently was a big, difficult adjustment in his life, and just try and show him that it's a good one. I hope this will help.