[kaz0408]

Hi

This is my first post and I apologise for the subject matter but I really need help from someone who understands. I have a beautiful 16yr old Staffie cross called Fred who we rescued 10 years ago. He has been a great dog but over the last year or so, he has started to show his age. His problems are in his hips and the rest of him seems to be healthy which really just makes things worse. I am discounting usual aging things like he's nearly totally deaf and his eyesight isn't great. Two weeks ago, I felt that he was in pain with his hips so took him to our vet for some pain relief. He was also dragging one leg and had started falling over. The vet said that Fred had thickened knees, arthritis in his hips and neurological damage. He prescribed Metacam for Fred and we started on the Monday. On Wednesday, he had terrible diahrroea so I discontinued meds and phoned the vet on Thus. He said to keep feeding him gentle foods but to bring him in if he got any worse overnight. Fred didn't get worse but his diahrroea continued and he started vomiting up yellow bile. He was still keen to eat and drink until Sat night. On Sunday, the diahrroea and vomiting continued although there was nothing really coming up as he was not eating or drinking. He just lay in his basket staring at me in such a sad way. I decided that with this new problem, along with his severe mobility problems, it would be kinder to have Fred put to sleep. I took him to the vet on Monday morning and said that I thought it was time to let him go. The vet said it had not come to that yet and kept him in and did bloods and put him on a drip. He wanted to do x-rays but when I said that Fred was not being operated on at his age, he changed his mind. When I picked him up that evening, Fred was a lot brighter but his mobility problems were obviously the same. It is now a week later and Fred is still on his light diet. He still has very soft stools (even runny) and is now passing a small amount of red blood at the end. He keeps tripping over his own leg and is increasingly losing his balance. He finds it nearly impossible to get up and has to be supported until his feet are square on the ground. I honestly feel that it would be kinder to say goodbye to him but it's so hard. Don't want to go back to that vet as I really can't face preparing myself for it again only to be told no. Any advice greatly appreciated. I want to do what's best for Fred.

[Lara's mom]

There will come a time for all of us when we're put in the position of making this decision. It never gets any easier. I'm truly sorry that it has come to this with you and Fred.

There is nobody who can tell you when "it's time." It's really hard to describe but, somehow you just know. For me, it comes down to a "quality of life" issue. How would you judge the quality of Fred's life? Does he appear happy? Does he still enjoy his meals, toys and time spent with you? Is he comfortable? I think that once you've answered these questions, you'll know in your heart whether "it's time."

If you come to the decision that it's time to say good-bye to Fred, call your vet, make an appointment and tell him what you've decided. Remember, you know Fred better than anyone else. Sometimes, saying good-bye is the ultimate act of love but only you can truly judge when that time has come.

[Yogi]

You are at a place I was 2 years ago with my ole Jack. He was arthritic andwas on prednisone and metacam for many years. He was nearly 17 when the time came that the meds no longer eased his joints and he could no longer get up. At that time I elected to take him to the vet. I knew in my heart that he had given all he could of himself and that now it was my turn to do for him and show him the kindness and love he had given me over the years. It was not fair to hang on to him for my personal reasons but moreso to ensure that he did not have to suffer.
None of us can tell you when the right time is. In each, we must realize and accept that as we do not live forever nor do those we love whether pet or person. The one thing we can do out of respect and love is make the passing as easy as possible. With this, it is left to each of us to know and accept then act on the right time.

[kaz0408]

Thanks for your help. I think I know that it's time for Fred to go. I can't bear the thought of my house without him but I know that it would be best for him. Today, he can't even get up himself and is just whining til I lift his back legs.
Once he's up he can walk but is very unsteady.

My real problem is that I took him to the vets last Mon and said that I thought it was time and the vet said no. I know it is and I knew it was then too but how do you argue against a professional? I gave in thinking he knew better but I know Fred best and would never do anything that wasn't in his best interests. I feel guilty enough choosing to have him put down without thinking I did it against medical advice. If I go there again and they say no again, I don't think I could stand it. Last week they said to bring him back this week and they would try him on Tramadol. I don't want them to "try" anything else on him. It's not going to help the neurological damage anyway. I want him to go with some dignity. He is such a fantastic dog. How do you know if the vet is telling the truth or if they are just hoping to make a few quid before the end? I now think that is what happened last week. Any tips?

Thanks for listening.

[Lara's mom]

You are Fred's ultimate caretaker and decision maker. It comes down to you to speak on his behalf. Tell the vet what you have decided and your reasons why. The vet may disagree but he does not have the right to gainsay your decision. You live with Fred every day. Nobody is in a better position to judge than you are. If you know in your heart that you're doing the right thing for him, you are. To end a life of suffering is the ultimate act of love. I'll be thinking of you and Fred as you take this one last journey together.

[DoggieVogue]

I'm so very sorry to hear Fred isn't feeling well. My heart goes out to you-I cannot imagine how much pain this must cause you. You know Fred better than anyone else and I think by letting him go, you are giving him the ultimate act of kindness. I would think that your vet would understand this as well. I was always told that you will know its time when you make a list of your dog's 5 favorite things and when he can't enjoy atleast 2 or 3, then its time. Fred has lived a long, full life and deserves his dignity, as you said. I hope this goes as smoothly as possible for you. You both will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[kaz0408]

Thanks for the kind words. Phoned the vet this afternoon and made the appointment for him to be put down. This time the vet did agree that it was time. It was very peaceful and he had some Maltesers near the end (his favourite naughty treat). I know that it was the right time and the kindest thing for him. Like to think he is waiting near the Rainbow Bridge for me.

Thanks again.

[Lara's mom]

I'm so very sorry that you had to loose Fred but, know you did the right thing for him. You will be in my thoughts.

[DoggieVogue]

I'm so sorry that you had to go through this. You made the right choice for your dog, and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

[Lara's mom]

Given the nature of the very sad subject content on this particular thread, do you not think your post which has nothing to do with the topic at hand, would have been better off placed elsewhere?

Someone here is grieving the loss of a beloved companion. I must say that under the circumstances, I find your post on this thread to be in the worst possible taste.

[DoggieVogue]

Originally Posted by Lara's mom

Given the nature of the very sad subject content on this particular thread, do you not think your post which has nothing to do with the topic at hand, would have been better off placed elsewhere?

Someone here is grieving the loss of a beloved companion. I must say that under the circumstances, I find your post on this thread to be in the worst possible taste.

Um, did you mean me? I'm confused. My post was right under yours, so I'm not sure if something got deleted or if I inadvertantly offended some one. I don't think I did, but if so, I do apologize.

[Yogi]

Originally Posted by DoggieVogue

Um, did you mean me? I'm confused. My post was right under yours, so I'm not sure if something got deleted or if I inadvertantly offended some one. I don't think I did, but if so, I do apologize.

no it was not you. Prior post has been deleted. Note: "dogculture" as the header in her lara's mom e-mail.

[Lara's mom]

No! Not at all! I'm really sorry if you thought I was referring to you. The post in question was removed my the moderators. I apologise for any misunderstanding.

[DoggieVogue]

Originally Posted by Lara's mom

No! Not at all! I'm really sorry if you thought I was referring to you. The post in question was removed my the moderators. I apologise for any misunderstanding.

No prob! I thought that was what happened, but I wanted to make sure! I was away for a few days and missed alot. This is a sensitive thread and I don't want to offend anyone, especially on such a sad topic. Thanks for clearing it up! :-D